For Lack of Family Counseling

KIEV, Ukraine -- Journalists in Kiev have called Viktor Yushchenko and Yulia Timoshenko “Papa” and “Mama” for a long time, especially after they fought last September and their children were traumatized. The Orange idyll, which so many had believed in, was over.

Can Papa (Yushchenko) and Mama (Timoshenko) ever can back together?

Papa, Mama and the kids spent the last few months getting ready for the elections. Each in their own way. The children, that is, the voters, had to decide whom they loved more – Papa or Mama, each of whom expected to be the more loved.

As conscientious parents do in marital crises, they lied to the children, promising them that they would be together again after the elections. Neither of them could admit that living and working together had become unbearable and that they were already dreaming of new spouses.

The voters would not have forgiven them for it – both parents dating Uncle Viktor on the side!

The elections were held and it turned out that Mama got 50 percent more love. That revelation changes nothing. The children are still waiting for their parents to keep their promise and come together again.

Neither Timoshenko nor Yushchenko intends to do it. They don't want a coalition with each other. Each of them wants to run the house, and the other won't stand for it. Moreover, they want to humiliate each other and take the children away from each other. Next elections, there should be no question of which parent to choose.

They can't do that to the children though. The one who files for divorce first will lose their love forever and a traitor, outcast and political dead meat. It'll be even worse if the children catch one of them Uncle Viktor Yanukovich. That's why Mama and Papa are trying to push each other into his arms by making impossible demands of each other.

Yulia Timoshenko says that she is going to be the prime minister, she will give out the key positions to her people, well, and share a little with the president's advisors from Our Ukraine, but not the ones he wants, just the ones she chooses.

Viktor Yushchenko and his friends reply that Timoshenko won't be prime minister and they have to agree on principles, not posts.

“Keep those friends of yours out of this house,” Mama hisses.

“Your place is in the kitchen,” Papa grumbles.

That could go one for a long time – until someone's nerves give out. Mama and Papa can argue in front of their children, accuse each other of all the mortal sins ad wait for the other to give up and run to Yanukovich. That will be legitimate grounds for divorce and the children will accept it then.

Neither Mama nor Papa will be happy with Viktor Yanukovich. The offend parent, left out of the coalition, will begin to boycott parliament and new elections will have to be held. And then the children will have the last word. All is fair in love and war.

Source: Kommersant